http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dyawj1-B9sc Laura from Chicago asked me: What’s wrong with going out with a married man - especially if he says his marriage is on the rocks, he plans on leaving his wife, and he hasn’t had sex with her in years?
Here are ten reasons why you shouldn’t “date” a married man:
1) If he’s unhappy – he should leave. PERIOD! Yes it’s hard financially, but it’s got to be done. Yes, it may be hard on the kids, but its worse to set an example of a bad marriage.
2) Once a cheat, always a cheat. I know a couple that both cheated on their spouses and got married. After 15 years, they’re both cheating on each other. Do you want to be with a cheater? Do you want to be with someone who lies on a daily basis to his wife about who he’s been with? If he cheated with his wife, he’ll most likely cheat on you.
3) You’ll be a home wrecker. Do you want to have that on your conscious? What will that woman think of you? What will you think of yourself? Will this help build your self-confidence?
4) He says he’s in an “open marriage”. That’s fine, but does she know that it’s open? Do you want to be with a liar? Do you want to be with someone untrustworthy?
5) Do you want to be the backup quarterback? Why shouldn’t you be the starter? Do you want to miss out on holidays, weddings, and Saturday nights, while he takes her out in public? Do you want to always be in hiding? Yes it’s exciting to have an afternoon rendezvous in a hotel, but that gets old. You deserve to be Numero Uno.
6) Who the hell does he think he is, and why does he get his cake and eat it too? What makes him so special that he gets to be with two women? Why do you want to be with a selfish, entitled person?
7) If the wife finds out, you’ll be opening a door to have her anger spill out on you and your family. Your reputation is at stake. Why give up the control you have on your life – remember, “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?” Yes he’ll tell you that he erases the texts, but how can you be sure that he never makes a mistake? A friend told me that he found out his wife cheated on him when he borrowed her phone and saw the post sex texts.
8) Single men are more likely to give you the respect and honesty that you hope to get in a relationship. You’ll get neither of that by getting involved with a married man. He’s okay with you waiting for him to break free of his family obligations? That’s not being respectful!
9) Diseases! He may be cheating on you as well as his wife. Don’t think he’s honest about wearing condoms! I know someone who was with a married man who later told her he was seeing many other women and had contracted HERPES! Remember, the difference between love and herpes? Herpes lasts forever.
10) It’s wrong! I’m open-minded and think that experimenting with like minded people is something personal and not to be judged. However, you’re participating in a dishonest, unethical activity. It’s one of the Ten Commandments! Don’t do it. The momentary pleasure is not worth the long-standing feelings of guilt and remorse.